Effort VS Closeness

Had a discussion with 3 other friends recently about the attention/concern given to friends in trouble. Realised that we have fundamentally different ideas of how much attention/concern should be given to what kind of friends when they are feeling unhappy or in trouble. Nothing wrong in either approaches but it does shows how different our ways of thinking are.

ME: the closer the friend is, the more concern I'll show. No matter the effort requires. If it's someone who don't matter to me, I won't give a shit.

Friend Number 1: If its a guy, I'll hesitate to show overt concern. It's enough to let him know that I'm there. Guys understand each other.

Friend Number 2: (Something to the same effect)

Friend Number 3: if it takes less effort, I'll do it no matter how shallow the relationship is. It's not wrong to show concern to a fellow human being.

The issue of gender aside, this conversation made me think. People have such diverse intentions and ways of interpretation of a simple gesture. For example, to some people, holding hands might not mean much, but to others, holding hands with someone meant that you like that person. It's a mistake to assume that the people showing you concern feels the same way you do towards giving that concern. It made me think back to the times I might have mis-interpreted gestures from others.

I hope I don't make that mistake anytime soon. Haha...